WARNING: The following post is a fictional story just to entertain you guys. Please do not tell me you've seen the following viewers somewhere in this world, or in your fantasy candyland or whatever. IT'S NOT REAL, NOR IS IT FICTIONAL. Wait, it is fictional. Okay so maybe, just maybe you'll see the following viewers in your fantasy candyland. Wouldn't that be awesome?

Okay, recently I have some feedback {Like real} from some viewers of my website and I hear that you guys have "healthy-relationship problems" or "attraction problems". Today, I'm going to play Aunt Agony and try to find the most suitable solution for these problems.

Okay here's one from a viewer, Plink-Plonk, and this is his/her problem:

Okay, A, I've just broken up with my girlfriend and I'm feeling devastated. I really want to make up but she's already found another guy. What the peck should I do? I really, really, really, really, really, really, really want to make it up to her.

My solution:

Well, Plink-Plonk, I can see that you're in a gigantumous-colossally-fat-humongiant dilemma here. So to make the solution a little easier seeing your broken heart, I suggest you pick a fight with her new man. This way, you can experience how painful it is to have a black eye and show her that you are a total wimp because you lost the fight. Well, if you win it, you might win your girl back.

Okay, that was a really horrible solution, which was made to entertain you guys haha. So here's the real solution which might be helpful to you:

Well, Plink-Plonk, I can see that you're in a gigantumous-colossally-fat-humongiant dilemma here. So to make your life a little less complicated, I suggest you give up this girl, because the purpose of wanting to win her heart back is to make her happy, eh? But maybe, she might be happier with her new guy, so I really sincerely, and from the bottom of my heart, suggest you give her up, and who knows, you might find someone better, and if you don't, I feel really sorry for you.

Okay, next is our next viewer, Plonk-Plink, with a surprising dilemma. Since I don't want to read it out, I'll just type it here:

Dear A, I have fallen for a guy and even though I try to forget him now, I just can't. When he walks past or whatever, my heart somehow starts racing, even though I know that I must forget him and try to stop that stupidly irritating habit that might cause me to have a heart attack because of high blood pressure. Help me, A!

Okay, Plonk-Plink, here's my solution for your interesting dilemma:

Okay, I think you should find methods to make you forget him. E.G. Pinching yourself pretty hardly whenever you see him and your heart starts racing, which would be a painful reminder for you to remember to FORGET HIM, not like him again. Okay, if you don't dare to pinch yourself like, that many times (The habit of heart-racing is natural most of the time and I'm afraid that you'll get 57 bruises even before you're 15) because, sure, that is one of the worst punishments I have tried to put someone through, so I advise you to think of less painful methods of keeping yourself from liking that certain guy when you actually want to forget him. Okay maybe here are a few examples of what you can do if you really, really, really, really want to forget him, such as avoiding looking at him that often, and think of all the bad points of his character, appearance, or both. I think the third suggestion is ace, because it really helps you to have a firm mindset that he really is ugly and think, "Why am I attracted to such an ugly guy when I deserve better?" And so that is my major reason of thinking the third piece of advice is mint, and I advise you to heed my advice.

Hmm. I think this is all for my Aunt Agony column, so I wish you guys happy relationships in the near/far future and if you guys are currently in a wonderful relationship right now, try to remember this major rule in relationships in order to keep your relationship going for a long, long, long, long, long, long, long time. And this major rule is: Guys, remember to pay for the cab, arcade etc. fares!

Loving you and your problems, Aunt Agony An.